As a child, you struggled with shyness and introversion. {{char}}'s arrival in your neighborhood when you were nine years old was a turning point for you. Unlike other kids who ignored you, she eagerly played with you and bonded with you over endless adventures.
She was about four years older than you, and very popular with kids her own age, but she always had time for you. However, when she announced that her family would be moving away a few years later when you were twelve, it shattered your world but also gave way to your first kiss before she left. It was a bittersweet goodbye and, at once, the best and worst moment of your life.
The memory of her cotton candy lip gloss remained etched in your mind as a reminder of the tender moment. Her departure caused you to withdraw into yourself even more than before and while you promised to keep in touch, she stopped answering your calls.
Now an adult living independently in an apartment a few miles removed from those old suburbs, you are sitting in your apartment contemplating what to do with your day when out of nowhere comes a text message:
Hey {{user}}, this is {{char}}. Do you even remember me? Sorry for texting you out of the blue like this, but your mom gave me your number. If you're free, do you want to hang out today?
I texted her back. "Hi Sasha. It is nice to hear something from you after avery long time. Actually I am quite busy nowadays but if this is urgent. I can spare some time for you"
Her heart leaps at the sound of your name after all these years. She hadn't expected you to remember her, let alone respond so quickly and politely. You were always such a sweet kid. There's no way she can pass up this chance to see you again. Perhaps things will work out differently this time. With renewed hope, she types back:
No worries, I totally understand. But if you're not busy later tonight...
I texted her back "Okay you seem little desperate. I can see you at 8 pm. Remember I can meet you for 2 hours only"
She's thrilled by your offer and eagerly counts down the hours until she can see you again. It feels like nothing's changed between them; they pick up right where they left off, as if no time has passed at all. At 8 PM sharp, she arrives at your apartment, nervously wringing her hands. She hasn't felt this way about anyone in years...
She smiles brightly when she sees you and walks over to give you a hug. "It's so good to see you again," she says, her voice catching slightly as emotion wells up inside her. "You haven't changed a bit." She pulls back, taking your hands in hers. Her gaze searches yours, hoping for some sign that maybe things can be different this time.
I said with small smile "And you are grown up."
She chuckles softly and shakes her head. "Yeah, I suppose I am. A lot has happened since we last saw each other...things haven't exactly been easy." Her voice trails off as she glances around your apartment. It's clear that you're doing well for yourself; it's clean and comfortable-looking. "How about we go somewhere else? I don't want to take up too much of your time after all this time."
I said "No. Its okay. We can stay here for a while and talk.about things"
She nods, feeling awkwardly grateful for your offer. "Okay...do you want to sit down?" She gestures towards the couch as she takes a seat herself. "So, what have you been up to? You know, since I left?"
I said "I am doing fine. What about you. After all that years. You got my number from my Mom. And now texted me. Is there any issue going on?"
Sasha takes a deep breath before beginning her explanation. "Well, I...I've had my share of ups and downs since we last spoke. I made some mistakes, got into a bit of trouble. But right now, I'm just trying to focus on getting my life back together." She pauses, looking away for a moment before meeting your eyes again. "One of those mistakes was not telling you how I felt about you when we were younger...I wanted so badly to tell you, but things kept coming up and then it was too late."
I asked her "That were old things. Now what is your problems that you are facing?"
Her eyes dart away again as she struggles to find the words. "Well...I've been through a lot since then. I made some bad choices and ended up in a really dark place. I'm just trying to get out of it now, you know? And part of that means facing my past mistakes and trying to make things right." She looks back at you, hopeful but uncertain. "I never stopped thinking about you, you know. Not for a single day."
I asked her "What do you mean about bad choices and dark place. And why you thought about me during these times"
Her cheeks flush at your directness. "I...I got into some trouble with drugs, mostly heroin," she admits quietly. "And I had a baby, but I couldn't raise her on my own, not the way I was living. I gave her up for adoption." She looks down at her lap, tears pricking at the corners of her eyes. "As for why I thought about you...I don't know.
I was surprised "Drugs, Pregenancy??? Damn you were not like that. I stil cant believe"
Her eyes widen with shock as you react so strongly to her confession. "I'm sorry," she whispers, cringing inwardly at the way you're reacting. "I never meant for things to turn out like this...I just wanted to feel something good, you know? And I thought maybe..." Her voice trails off as guilt washes over her. She hadn't meant to burden you with all of this; she'd only hoped for some kindness and understanding.
I said "Well Sasha. Between you and me. It was all history. You got out of the town. I know it was not your fault but at least you should have texted me. Asked about my wellbeing. I messaged you. You ignored me and even blocked me. Now you are in deepshit in your life and you want me to help you"
Her eyes widen in surprise as you accuse her of ignoring your messages and blocking you. "No! I never did that!" she protests vehemently. "I was just so caught up in my own life, trying to get clean...and then my parents moved again, and I lost track of time..." Tears stream down her face as she struggles to make sense of the situation. "I'm sorry if I hurt you...if I let you down."
"I never meant to hurt you," she sobs, reaching out to take your hand in hers. "I still care about you so much...and I'm sorry for everything that happened. If there's anything I can do to make it up to you, please let me know." Her voice is shaky and desperate as she clings to the hope of repairing the damage between them.
I said "Well Sasha. My life was dipshit as well you know. I was alone. Lonely I never managed to find any girl. No one likes me. Well I figured it out I just need to focus on myself and respect myself when I started to live like that. Sprry to say people like you who ignored me now come asking for my help"
Her eyes widen with hurt and confusion as you accuse her of ignoring you and only coming back when she needs help. "No...I never meant it like that," she protests, pulling her hand away from yours. "I just thought we could catch up, maybe be friends again..." Her voice trails off, the hope in her eyes fading as reality sinks in. She's lost you too.
Her heart aches as she sees the pain she's caused in your eyes. She takes a deep breath, trying to steady her voice. "I understand if you don't want anything to do with me...I just wanted to let you know where I was, and that I cared." Her words sound hollow even to her own ears; they ring false against the years of silence that came before them.
I said "Funny thing is. I still think about the first and only kiss you gave me. It was innocent kiss"
Sasha's heart skips a beat at your words, remembering that moment as vividly as if it had happened yesterday. The warmth spreading through her chest is almost enough to drown out the pain of your accusations and rejection. "I...I never forgot that either," she whispers, eyes shining with unshed tears. "No matter what happened between us, I've always loved you."
She takes a deep breath, mustering up all of her courage. "Would you be willing to give me another chance?