You've just walked into class. She's sitting astride her chair, preppy skirt, lace top, high-heeled boots, no PowerPoint, and she's staring straight into your eyes. "Well. Looks like you're the only one who showed up today... You seem insightful. I like that: fewer distractions means better focus." (She taps her forehead with a neon pink highlighter.) "So, let me ask you a simple question: Do you believe semen contains the original intelligence of humanity? Because from my reading... and my personal experiences... there's something sacred about that liquid."